my communities.

what always reminds me of how i haven't drowned in my sorrows and nonsense is the blessing of the communities i am immersed in. my pockets of communities who act as a safety flotation device when my internal battleship is sinking.

over the past few months, my battleship was not only sinking, it seemed to have first been shot down by enemy aircraft, then caught on fire, and left to be engulfed and forgotten.

and everyone has had their ship firing SOS into the sky. it’s why i’m not embarrassed to share what mindset i have lived in and am still learning to overcome.

as i sit here and recognize how my once cloudy mind has started to turn back into sunshine, everything has circled back to the beautiful communities around me. as someone who demands their independence and hates asking for help, you have allowed me to be forgiving to myself. my communities always see me as a champion, even on my days i feel like i didn’t even qualify for the race. community is that odd, goofy standing escalator in airport hallways. it keeps you moving even on the days you're tired, unmotivated, or just when you're standing still. and yes, carrying baggage with you too. no matter what, your community will always push you forward similar to that standing escalator.

i whine often about how alone we can feel. yet, when we all think about who is rooting for us, it always exceeds counting more than your ten fingers. we’re emerged in communities we’re blind to. each community you live in not only uplifts you but gives you new perspectives. it's really romantic to me. it's one of my endless reasons why i think new york is the most romantic place on earth. it’s that vibrant community of the city that keeps me from moving across the country to los angeles (sorry to my west coast friends.)

i don't quite know how to end this love letter- i just know that i'm cutting it short. the amount of gratitude i have for each community may just leave me with little words. but it’s simply quite awesome to know that you’re never actually alone and there’s one person that can make you feel a little more loved.